A friend of mine recently said that its quite different to love somebody and to be in love with somebody…. Got me thinking…. They are such simple words yet has so much depth to it….
It is quite often now we see that people who are married have strong feelings for others in their life. Before you blame them, put a thought across why should have that happened in the first place… If they were completely satisfied in their first relation, they would not have ever been in search for another…and we know no relation is perfect, but if the couple were happy together then there was never a place for the third person. They would have never felt the chill on their spine and goosebumps on the arms and butterflies in the stomach when they met this new person and their eyes locked for the first time or when they shook hands for the first time, if everything was simply imperfectly perfect in their marriage life.. Definitely you care and love your life partner but you are not in love with him/her.
What if you are out of a relationship for which you gave it your all, your blood and your soul, but for whatever reason it may have been, had to get out of it… you thought of this person as your soulmate, your friend and your advisor, your first thought as the first rays of the sun awake you and the last memory on your mind as you drift off to sleep … you might not be around him/her but the very thought of him/her make you blush, gives you a chill, and makes you feel all the fight is worthwhile….Now, here you are in love with a person….
And when you did get out of this blissful relationship, just imagine how long would it take for you to even start loving another person, forget about falling in love with him/her.
Bite the reality..swallow the bitterness -but its true…
The real world might be harsh and rude and one searches for their fantasy world where everything is rosy. What makes the fantasy world so beautiful is the sheer fact that the real world is so cruel and harsh and so only when one falls back from the fantasy world, they feel even worse coz now they know the taste of honey which lies within the beehive of thousands of stinging honeybees.
Fantasy is a place to escape when you no longer want to live in real life -where you can let your imagination run free and have control over what you see and hear. That’s where you fall in love with someone.
There comes a point in your life, when you are tired of chasing and trying to fix things… its not giving up- its realizing that you don’t need some things, and that extra drama they bring along. As long as I have been breathing, people have been deceiving… Been through the breakups, backstabs and lies….
I do think we try to create in our little fantasy world what we desire in our real world relationships and tend to get lost. This is not when we become really desperate, but just by searching for some place to fulfill desires . And when people are desperate we are able to believe in what we need to believe in rather than what actually is. Many wonderful memories and certain closeness a bond that can bring and will never end..
The need to be loved makes us use our fantasy thinking. Who has not imagined finding a desperately needed love or exaggerated its sincerity or completeness? We can experience good things for a time but' hopefully have the sense to pull out and remain friends .We experience so much disappointment later in life when our hopes are dashed by reality. It seems we need to control our imagining so it does not set us up for more unrealistic expectations and suffer even more. I feel we can have resilience to endure and push forward not to risk it again.
We look for others that have the same feelings and desires, and use our ability to create a unique world. We see ourselves and project it outside, giving it reality in the heart of our creation, to hide from reality and imagine an inner place the ability to dream of a better world. Creativity is a human gift you spend your life trying to create a part of the world that gives you comfort.
Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really do is cry.
There's no reality except the one contained within us. That's why so many people live an unreal life. They take images outside them for reality and never allow the world within them to assert itself.
When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.
Simple facts – It is good to live in an illusionary world but know when is the right time to buckle up the seat belt on a flight back to reality… none of us want to get hurt in emergency landings..…
Never force yourself or someone else to fall in love ..Force never creates love, only creates distance….
So if you got my love, don’t abuse it and if you have my trust, don’t ever lose it.
Man’s character is his fate.
ReplyDeleteSo create your character and discover your fate!
Simple...:D